Look! There behind the coffee counter….it’s Pretentious Man!

Just a question…what is the criteria they used to hire coffee servers in the over priced coffee shops?  How insulting can you be?  How disinterested can you appear?  Or perhaps it is based on hair?
Now granted I should probably make my own, but there I was down on the avenue waiting to pick up my daughter from work.  A nice black tea latte should fill the time till she is off I think.  The problem is that I can’t always remember whether it is pretentious shop A – second cup, or pretentious shop B- starbucks that has the drink.
Not much of a problem since the coffee wars started years ago – not as bad a toronto where on one downtown corner you have a starbucks, a second cup, a timothy’s and a tim’s – but we are working up to it here.  So I stop into the second cup and ask if they have lactaid milk.  I don’t mumble, I have no speech impediment nor an accent and the server behind the counter has an appearance of not being a recent immigrant.  However.  Pretentious boy looks down his nose at me and replies…’ummmm, latte milk?" No I tell him…LACT – AID milk I enunciate clearly for him.   "Ummm, like a steamer?……Ummmm do you mean homogenated milk?"  He draws out his answers, barely able to conceal the rolling of his eyes while he maintains his profile in presentation to me.   A flip of the flowing locks and a resettling of his black-clad ass as he realizes he is not going to have to put out much effort here.  No I say, if you don’t know what it is you probably don’t have it.
As I exit the store he is suddenly able to rouse himself to a level of interest in me and speaking loudly now so teh whole store can hear he says …"Sorry that whatever issue in your life is making it difficult for you"
Little prick.  I wave him my middle finger and cross the street to option B.
Where they DO have lactaid and can understand me…or so I think.
The coffee server presents me with a small  and I "oh, I ordered a large", now get a  grandiloquent lecture on the sizes and proper ordering technique from white haired arty girl frothing the milk.  And then a condescending summary of why she made a small instead of a large.
Where did it come about that serving coffee – albeit overpriced coffee – means you are now a higher order than those of us on the other side of the counter?  You are serving COFFEE – Not performing brain surgery, not curing cancer, not bringing about peace in the middle east.  Is it true that this generation is more narcisstistic that previous ones?  You may have a little chalk board where it tells us that you are a ‘barrista’ and what your pithy little thoughts are, but you are making coffee for a living.  Is this where you imagined yourself back while you pondered the nilistic way of life in philosophy 101?  Is your dissatisfaction with your psuedo-goth presentation chafing you ‘down there’?
Build a bridge.

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